11 Essential Traits of a True Man

with 7 Comments


This is a follow-up to On Father’s Day – A Father’s Advice to His Sons


Okay — I’ve got some bad news for you.


In case you didn’t know, your manhood is under serious attack.


Clint Eastwood vs. Pale Vampire Dude










With the constant attacks by feminism for the past 40 years or so, modern men are being shortchanged.


Feminism might have started out with noble goals, but over the years it has morphed into something unrecognizable.


Men Are Idiots


Almost every television show or advertisement portrays the dad as an idiot and his wife as his intellectual superior.


Homer and Marge










Even when men on television attempt to be noble, they are portrayed as if they are morons.


This is not by accident.


In today’s culture it is sin to present a man actually acting like, well…like men should.


Young boys grow up these days ashamed to act like the men they were meant to be.


Effeminate or metrosexual men are constantly paraded in front of us as the new ideal.














Listen – You can be whatever you want to be.  It doesn’t affect me either way.


What I object to is the insistence that the time-tested, traditional role of manhood is outdated or is somehow wrong – or that being a real man is detrimental to women.


Absolutely nothing could be further from the truth.


Real men are timeless


I’ll promise you this – any man who sticks to the time tested model for manhood will stand out from the crowd – because there will be so few like him.


It has been and always will be true – women will flock to a real man.  Women will always be drawn to a man who is not afraid to be true to himself.  And other men will secretly wish they could be like him.


woman admiring man









But there is a growing chorus who cannot stand for men to be men.


They believe that when a man is ‘allowed’ to be strong it makes others weak, so they do everything they can to tear men down.


A person can only be made to look weak if they are, in fact, weak.


In truth, if you are a strong person, another person’s strength doesn’t affect you.


It doesn’t make you weak to recognize or acknowledge another person’s strength.


By the same token, in spite of what popular culture teaches, with deliberate, committed work, you can become whatever you want to be, and that includes being a strong man – being a true man.


Since that sort of man seems to be in such short supply these days, I sat down and scribbled out a list of the traits that I believe make a true man.


Here’s my list, in no particular order.




STANDS UP for himself and for his principles.


PROTECTS and provides for his own. He does not back down when his friends or loved ones are in danger.


TAKES RESPONSIBILITY for his own actions. If he fails he doesn’t blame anyone else.


VALUES INTELLIGENCE AND PHYSICAL STRENGTH equally – A true man develops a sound mind through lifelong study and a strong body through vigorous activity.


UNDERSTANDS THE VALUE OF DIPLOMACY –  He reduces conflict when possible as long as the issue does not counter his principles.  He uses intelligence to speak to his adversaries with diplomacy if at all possible, but, failing that see the next item.




CONTROLS HIS EMOTIONS and his reactions at all times (especially when dealing with his adversaries).


IS SUPREMELY CONFIDENT – believes he can do all things, but recognizes when he needs help and isn’t afraid to ask.  Recognizes his fears and moves forward in spite of them.


ACTS DECISIVELY when required, but bases decisions on experience and/or advice from others who have experienced the same situation whenever possible.


DOESN’T WALLOW in misery when life trips him up.  Picks himself up and keeps going even when he doesn’t feel like it.


IS TRANSPARENT – A true man does not play with another person’s emotions. He always makes sure his intentions are clear.



As you read the items listed above, did you find yourself agreeing and wishing you had these traits?


Take some time right now to imagine how your life might be different if you started acting according to these ideals.


Instead of just imagining, here’s my advice to you – copy this list to a piece of paper that you can keep with you at all times.


I encourage you to rewrite this list and the definitions in your own words so that you can better identify with them.


Read these each morning when you get up.  Internalize these traits so that they become part of your character.  


If you can make them a part of your character you’ll be able to act instinctively without having to over analyze the situations you face.


Whether you agree or disagree with my list, take a second to tell me about it in the comments.




7 Responses

  1. Daniel Ndukwu

    “What I object to is the insistence that the time-tested, traditional role of manhood is outdated or is somehow wrong – or that being a real man is detrimental to women.” Preach Daniel

    I read the 11 and agree with what you said afterwards, I wish I had more of the traits that you listed because it is important to be a well rounded man.
    The thing with the people that are being portrayed in the media these days is that everyone wants to portray a politically correct face to the world. We can be sued for anything and everything that can “insult” someone else. (I wrote an article about that on ezine and it was syndicated far and wide.

    I remember being called a misogamist for just being a man, doing what is expected of men. I moved from Atlanta GA about 8 years ago and settled in Africa for a while, although they have a lot of problems, being men that are unashamed of their manhood is not one of them.
    Cheers Daniel and thanks for sharing

  2. Daniel Black

    Daniel Ndukwu said,

    “I wrote an article about that on ezine and it was syndicated far and wide.”

    I would be interested in reading that article if you could provide a link.

  3. Jose

    This is a great and fascinating post you wrote. I will have to agree with you that Men are becoming extinct! I grew up in a time when Men were still allowed to be Men and to see the degeneracy of society to strip men from their manliness is sick as well as sad.
    Being a Man is what a Man should be and not what society dictates. Society is afraid of Men because we have the capacity to change society whether by Diplomacy or brute force. I will not apologize for being a Man or what we Latinos call “Machismo”! This is how God made us to be and no matter what society does there will always be Men like ourselves looking to get back to the basics.
    The list you wrote about being a real man is true as I fit in some of those rules you spoke about. Learning to keep your emotions at bay, Taking responsibilities when I mess up, Stepping up when a friend or family member is in need of help as well as using words and being Diplomatic.
    I walk with my head up confident facing all problems as they come and people do notice. Hell even my Wife has told me that at times I have no fear when problems tend to pop up. I just jump in get it done, get over it and move on. Emotions, arguing are just a waste of time.
    Also I would like to read the article that the commenter was talking about. It might be a good read. I’m going to see if I find him.
    Again Daniel Great Post!

  4. Daniel Black

    Great comments Jose! Sounds like you’ve already given a number of these topics some serious thought.

    If you do happen to find that article, please let me know as well.

  5. Daniel Ndukwu

    @Jose Nice one man. I have not had the opportunity to live in Latin America but I think that is where my adventures will take me before long. I just hope that I receive a warm welcome and am able to fit in down there.

    @Daniel here is a link to the article http://ezinearticles.com/?Are-Men-Being-Emasculated-in-the-Twenty-First-Century?&id=9061114.
    I hope you enjoy it

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